Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Top Ten Reasons to Live Alone

The purpose of this post is to highlight all the things I love about living alone.
Obviously, this list is informed by my experiences living with men, but since experiences tend to be universal, I hope you can relate, rant and maybe laugh. Please feel free to add your own in the comments section.

  1. Never hearing someone "hawk a loogie" (sp?)
  2. Not encountering dirty socks on a table, kitchen counter, or any other inappropriate place. (Aside: I have a two year old, and she puts her dirty socks in the hamper; there is no excuse.)
  3. If I'm looking for keys (and I'm not, they're in the key bowl by the door, duh) they're mine.
  4. Related to the above, never being accused of having moved something (to ultimately discover it was either on the person or in the pants pocket of the person who lost it and desperately needs your help looking).
  5. No toothpaste globbed up in the sink (sometimes with hair--<<shudder>>).
  6. Not encountering a tp roll with two squares on it.
  7. Never being awakened at 3:30am by someone asking if I'm asleep. (WTAF?)
  8. Not getting the 5 pm phone call at work: "When are you going to be home?" (Answer: when I am G-d good and ready!)
  9. Laundry. I could do an entire post on inappropriate laundry behavior.
  10. Silence. Glorious, beautiful quiet. 

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